The Big Day
The wedding day has approached for a couple who has had everything going perfect. As the bride gets ready in her beautiful white gown the man is in traffic running late to his wedding. He got stuck being a wagon, train tracks, and many other obstacles. Luckily his Volkswagen helped him approach his big day. He parked the car and ran as quickly as he could into the church. The wedding had began and the sight of what the man saw left him in utter shock. He saw his future wife marrying another man. that seemed identical to him. That day he learned a lesson to never be late because you will miss a big opportunity, unfortunately in his case it was his wedding.
Notes
Who:
-Man Driving Car [Jon Bryan](Seems anxious and nervous)
- Andy Conte
-(Seems like father)
-In the room(Bit Odd)
-Brides Mates
-Bride[Angelic Conte]
(Seemes Happy)
-Man who may be marrying the couple(The Priest, Raf Smith)
-Man getting married[Jack Brown]
What:
-Sweating
-Looks Towards Window
-Shuts the door of the Church
- Help the Bride fix her dress and help her get ready
- Fidgeting with her ring
-Looking out the window
-Marrying the Bride[Angelic]
When:
- Morning or Evening
Where:
- Fields, Road, Forest, Beach, Beach, Mountains, City
-Church
Why:
Rushing to see and gain something
How:
By rushing
Interview of Bride[Angelic]:
1. How do you feel today on your big day?
Today I feel blessed to have such amazing support and people in my life, I also feel a bit overwhelmed with the love from all my family. I'm more nervous because I think Jon thinks he is marrying me.
2. What day do you consider you be your big day?
Today is my big day, September 28th, 2017.
3. What obstacles have you faced throughout the journey that has led to today?
Some obstacles I have faced throughout my journey is evaluating my actions and thoughts on whether being married is the next step for me and if I was doing the right thing at the right time.
4. Who is your fiancé?
Ummm. ummm. My fiancé is Jack
5. Why do you think Jon walked into the Church?
I will take blame for me misleading him and I think I lost both Jon and Jack today.
Interview of Jon:
1. Why are you anxious?
I'm anxious because today is my big day, it's my wedding day. Also I'm extremely anxious because i'm running late.
2. What has made today the worst?
The horrible long car drive through the fields, bumpy roads, forests, beaches, mountains, and the city ha made me late.
3. Do you know the guy Angelic is marrying?
What type of question was that.... obviously I know myself.
4. In what relation do you have with Angelic?
She's my beautiful fiancé.
5. How shocked were you when you walked into the church?
I was extremely shocked to be in that church, but Angelica definitely knows she lost me and possibly Jack. I walked in exited, shocked to find out she was getting married to another man.
Interview of Andy:
1. Why are you constantly checking your watch?
I'm anxious and i'm constantly checking my watch because i'm assuring Jon misses the wedding because he thinks he's marrying my daughter but my daughter is in love with Jack.
2. Who is your daughters fiance?
My daughters finance is Jack. Although she has misled Jon into thinking he is her fiancé.
3. Why are you in the room with your daughter?
At a young age she lost her mother, so it is my job to be there for her on her wedding.
4. How do you think today will plan out?
Today will be hectic, especially if Jon walks in during the wedding. My daughter is strong and brave, but she is still young and may be making a mistake today.
5. What were you thinking when Jon walked in?
I was more than angry at my daughter for misleading two men. I was thinking thoughts that made me feel rage. Both the men she has admired had left her on her big day.
Interview of the Priest:
1. Who are you marrying today?
Today i'm marrying Angelic and Jack.
2.How will today plan out?
Today will be an amazing day for this beautiful couple.
3. What are you most anxious about?
I'm most anxious for the couple because they have to take a big step in their life.
4. Why do you think the dad of the bride is constantly checking the watch?
I was wondering the same thing... maybe he is anxious for the wedding.
Interview of Jack:
1. Whats your relation with the bride?
I am the brides fiancé. We are in love and ready to get married.
2. What is the mood of the day?
Today is an exiting, nervous, and sure to be overwhelming day. Im nervous because i'm scared Jon will show up because I think Angelica has been misleading him into thinking he is her fiancé .
3. What are you most anxious about?
I'm most nervous about seeing Angelica because I know she is going to blow me away. I'm also nervous that she's not ready to get married because she is still young and I have seen her acting weird lately.
4. What do you know about Jon?
Jon is Angelicas Best Friend.
5. Who walked into your wedding?
When John walked in my heart sank, I knew I was done with Angelica. Angelica was amazing, but her conflict came through today, not only did she lose me but she lost Jon to, best of luck for her in the future.
Story
Word Count:426
It was an early morning, September 28, 2017 the wedding of an couple at a church because of their love for each other.
"I'm anxious because today is my big day, it's my wedding day, " bride, Conte said.
Today is a big day as it is a wedding for an couple, they are sure to be nervous.
"Today is an exiting, nervous, and sure to be overwhelming day," the fiancé of Angelicas, Jack Brown, said.
It isn't a hundred percent clear who is getting married to the bride.
"I am the brides fiancé," said Brown. "I'm nervous because I'm scared Jon will show up because I think Angelica has been misleading him into thinking he is her fiancé.],"Brown Said, "we are in love and ready to get married."
The wedding was interrupted by a man in a suite.
"I was more than angry at my daughter for misleading two men. I was thinking thoughts that made me feel rage," father of the bride, Andy said.
The mood shifted and the hardships of the journey for Angelica can be seen by her face expressions.
"Some obstacles I have faced throughout my journey is evaluating my actions and thoughts on whether being married is the next step for me and if I was doing the right thing at the right time."Angelica said
The mood shifted and the audience became awestruck.
"My daughter is strong and brave, but she is still young and may be making a mistake today," Andy said.
"Angelica was amazing, but her conflict came through today, not only did she lose me but she lost Jon too, best of luck for her in the future," Jack said.
Notes
Who:
-Man Driving Car [Jon Bryan](Seems anxious and nervous)
- Andy Conte
-(Seems like father)
-In the room(Bit Odd)
-Brides Mates
-Bride[Angelic Conte]
(Seemes Happy)
-Man who may be marrying the couple(The Priest, Raf Smith)
-Man getting married[Jack Brown]
What:
-Sweating
-Wiping his Brow
-Driving with one hand
-Driving Fast
-Driving with one hand
-Driving Fast
-Jon Checks His Watch (Running Late)
-Go's past the trailer
-Angry
-Races up the Church door
- Andy Checks His Watch-Looks Towards Window
-Shuts the door of the Church
- Help the Bride fix her dress and help her get ready
- Fidgeting with her ring
-Looking out the window
-Marrying the Bride[Angelic]
When:
- Morning or Evening
Where:
- Fields, Road, Forest, Beach, Beach, Mountains, City
-Church
Why:
Rushing to see and gain something
How:
By rushing
Interview of Bride[Angelic]:
1. How do you feel today on your big day?
Today I feel blessed to have such amazing support and people in my life, I also feel a bit overwhelmed with the love from all my family. I'm more nervous because I think Jon thinks he is marrying me.
2. What day do you consider you be your big day?
Today is my big day, September 28th, 2017.
3. What obstacles have you faced throughout the journey that has led to today?
Some obstacles I have faced throughout my journey is evaluating my actions and thoughts on whether being married is the next step for me and if I was doing the right thing at the right time.
4. Who is your fiancé?
Ummm. ummm. My fiancé is Jack
5. Why do you think Jon walked into the Church?
I will take blame for me misleading him and I think I lost both Jon and Jack today.
Interview of Jon:
1. Why are you anxious?
I'm anxious because today is my big day, it's my wedding day. Also I'm extremely anxious because i'm running late.
2. What has made today the worst?
The horrible long car drive through the fields, bumpy roads, forests, beaches, mountains, and the city ha made me late.
3. Do you know the guy Angelic is marrying?
What type of question was that.... obviously I know myself.
4. In what relation do you have with Angelic?
She's my beautiful fiancé.
5. How shocked were you when you walked into the church?
I was extremely shocked to be in that church, but Angelica definitely knows she lost me and possibly Jack. I walked in exited, shocked to find out she was getting married to another man.
Interview of Andy:
1. Why are you constantly checking your watch?
I'm anxious and i'm constantly checking my watch because i'm assuring Jon misses the wedding because he thinks he's marrying my daughter but my daughter is in love with Jack.
2. Who is your daughters fiance?
My daughters finance is Jack. Although she has misled Jon into thinking he is her fiancé.
3. Why are you in the room with your daughter?
At a young age she lost her mother, so it is my job to be there for her on her wedding.
4. How do you think today will plan out?
Today will be hectic, especially if Jon walks in during the wedding. My daughter is strong and brave, but she is still young and may be making a mistake today.
5. What were you thinking when Jon walked in?
I was more than angry at my daughter for misleading two men. I was thinking thoughts that made me feel rage. Both the men she has admired had left her on her big day.
Interview of the Priest:
1. Who are you marrying today?
Today i'm marrying Angelic and Jack.
2.How will today plan out?
Today will be an amazing day for this beautiful couple.
3. What are you most anxious about?
I'm most anxious for the couple because they have to take a big step in their life.
4. Why do you think the dad of the bride is constantly checking the watch?
I was wondering the same thing... maybe he is anxious for the wedding.
Interview of Jack:
1. Whats your relation with the bride?
I am the brides fiancé. We are in love and ready to get married.
2. What is the mood of the day?
Today is an exiting, nervous, and sure to be overwhelming day. Im nervous because i'm scared Jon will show up because I think Angelica has been misleading him into thinking he is her fiancé .
3. What are you most anxious about?
I'm most nervous about seeing Angelica because I know she is going to blow me away. I'm also nervous that she's not ready to get married because she is still young and I have seen her acting weird lately.
4. What do you know about Jon?
Jon is Angelicas Best Friend.
5. Who walked into your wedding?
When John walked in my heart sank, I knew I was done with Angelica. Angelica was amazing, but her conflict came through today, not only did she lose me but she lost Jon to, best of luck for her in the future.
Story
Word Count:426
It was an early morning, September 28, 2017 the wedding of an couple at a church because of their love for each other.
"I'm anxious because today is my big day, it's my wedding day, " bride, Conte said.
Today is a big day as it is a wedding for an couple, they are sure to be nervous.
"Today is an exiting, nervous, and sure to be overwhelming day," the fiancé of Angelicas, Jack Brown, said.
It isn't a hundred percent clear who is getting married to the bride.
"I am the brides fiancé," said Brown. "I'm nervous because I'm scared Jon will show up because I think Angelica has been misleading him into thinking he is her fiancé.],"Brown Said, "we are in love and ready to get married."
The wedding was interrupted by a man in a suite.
"I was more than angry at my daughter for misleading two men. I was thinking thoughts that made me feel rage," father of the bride, Andy said.
The mood shifted and the hardships of the journey for Angelica can be seen by her face expressions.
"Some obstacles I have faced throughout my journey is evaluating my actions and thoughts on whether being married is the next step for me and if I was doing the right thing at the right time."Angelica said
The mood shifted and the audience became awestruck.
"My daughter is strong and brave, but she is still young and may be making a mistake today," Andy said.
"Angelica was amazing, but her conflict came through today, not only did she lose me but she lost Jon too, best of luck for her in the future," Jack said.
The lead is a little haphazard and not easy to read. Remember simple and concise. Describe the moment to your readers, using the 5 Ws and 1H. The story you told is fine, but some of the quotes are stacked quotes from multiple people. You are missing the structure and style that we need in news stories.
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